Lucanne Alexandra and the Reluctant Father

I am the reluctant father, not reluctant in my love or admiration or awe of our child, but reluctant in my desire to spontaneously share that love, admiration, and awe with others.

Every father speaks about their children with pride and I am no exception, but I have been resolved in my goal of not being "that guy". You know the guy that so expounds on his child's gifts and achievements that he has become a boorish git that you try to avoid. When asked I do go on (ramble) about our remarkable daughter, but my policy is that I try not to volunteer my stories.

The last week has seen three rather amazing things from our two-month-old: mimicry, preference, and her first word. I now break my reluctance policy to expound at length on our amazing child and her incredible development.

Since the day she was born, Lucanne Alexandra has displayed unusual development. 14 hours after her birth the staff Pediatrician at the hospital, while giving Lucanne her first exam, commented on three things that he had rarely (or never) seen in a newborn. She only seemed to cry as a specific response to stimulus, not indiscriminately as most newborns. When she did cry she was very quick to calm herself. And finally, she could focus her eyes. This last point was very shocking to him as he realized that not only could she focus, but she was following his movements with her eyes at various depths.

Within the first two days of her life, Karna and I came to realize that Lucanne already had a vocabulary of sounds. Not just a variety of cries, she had very distinct noises each with specific purposes. She only cried at pain, she grunted when she was hungry (earning her first nickname - McGilla Gorilla), and she whimpered softly when uncomfortable (specifically with a dirty diaper). The older she gets the more nuanced this vocabulary of sounds has become.

Within the first two weeks, Lucanne had reach significant milestones of rolling on to her side unassisted, scooting all over the bed when placed on her stomach, being able to hold her head up on her own (albeit for only 30-90 seconds before she lost focus and let it flop down), and finally rolling over on her own. According to the popular baby books, most of these milestones would be expected at three months or well beyond in some cases.

By a month she was smiling - and not "from gas". When Karna told her mother about the smiling, Monika was dismissive that it was gas, but when Karna brought Lucanne to Monika's office so she could show off her granddaughter, the baby cooed, smiled, and even giggled her way through all the attention. At that moment Monika realized something remarkable is going on with this child. Also within that first month she went from holding her head up to moving it all around, following noises and movement

In the last month, Karna and I have become accustomed to Lucanne's abilities and haven't really reacted to what are really remarkable feats. When I reflect on it, there are many things to note:

• She had always had a purposeful grip since the day she was born; she held on to my finger for an hour while the nurses attended her. In the last month she began reaching for and grabbing things.
• She's also been trying to pull herself up, she can't get there on her own, but she can get half way.
• She's begun lifting her torso with her back muscles, again she can't sit up or anything, but when either Karna or I go to pick her up, she lifts her back toward us to help.
• She's begun to use her face to express what she's thinking/feeling - most notably she furrow's her brow (just like her Daddy) when she's frustrated or working something out.
• Also like her Daddy, she Michael Jordans her tongue when she's trying hard to do something, like pulling herself up.
• She also began "talking" in the last month, not words, but really purposeful noises, usually when she's trying to get attention.
• Finally, when set on an incline against my knees, Lucanne has begun to start to push herself up with her legs.

This gets you caught up on Lucanne in the first several weeks of her life and brings us to the astonishing developments of the last week...

Mimicry - last Friday, I was holding our daughter on my lap so she could work on pushing with her legs. This activity always gets her very engaged and usually smiling. It also is a source of relief to her when she's got gas, as the bending of her legs usually helps her pass the gas. So we were doing her "squats" and she extended her legs all the way and she just stopped and stared at me, very intently. I was stuck for what to do so I stuck my tongue out at her, she did the same. I was skeptical that this was a coincidence and I did it again, nothing. Now more convinced the first time was a coincidence, I did it a third time; Lucanne stuck her tongue out again. Now, my skepticism waning, I kept sticking my tongue out, and most times Lucanne mimicked me. My last fleeting wedge of skepticism vanished when I rolled my tongue and Lucanne spent 5 minutes trying to do it. (For those of you interested in the genetically inherited trait of tongue-rolling, she did finally get it - sort of - but I could see that her tongue definitely does articulate that way, she just couldn't hold it there.)

Preference - Last Sunday, Karna was holding Lucanne in her lap and Lucanne was watching the TV. She's been doing that for about 3-4 weeks now, but we always thought it was a mindless attention grabber and not something she was thinking about. Lucanne is always attentive and rarely startled by loud noises when she's awake, the dogs, thunder, and noises like that don't faze her. In the car when she's fussy a heavy bass line, rap or trance music, generally is soothing to her. This particular evening we were watching "The Kingdom", a heavily violent political thriller type movie - lots of noise of bombs and gunfire. I paused the movie to talk to Karna about a particular scene and Lucanne WENT OFF!!! She was MAD!!! The timing was too coincidental for me to dismiss her fury as anything else, so I restarted the movie and she settled right down. I assumed it was the noise she was engaged by so I muted the TV - this didn't faze her, she kept watching. I paused it again (still muted) and again she WENT OFF!!! I changed the channel; she paused in her tantrum to see what was on the TV and immediately went back to her tantrum. It wasn't until we were back on the movie that she settled down and went back to watching. She wanted to watch THAT movie - I only can hope she still doesn't understand what she was seeing...we need to get "Baby Einstein" QUICKLY!!!

First Word - Since I recognized that Lucanne had a vocabulary of sounds, I began talking to her based on those sounds. The first night we had her home, I was holding her and she started getting fidgety and grunting, so I asked her, "Lucanne, are you hungry? Hungry?" Karna teased me that first time saying "Are you kidding, she's two-days-old? What do you expect?" But very quickly Karna realized what potential Lucanne has and started doing the same thing. So since birth we've not baby-talked Lucanne, we just ask her about what's going on with her based on her sounds. We generally will repeat and focus on the key word to the situation: hungry, dirty, tired, etc.

For about the past three or four days Lucanne has been responding to those questions, especially "Are you hungry?” Four days ago when she got fidgety, Karna would ask her "Are you hungry?" and Lucanne would reply with "ugh-y". I was completely dismissive thinking that we were hearing what we wanted to hear and it was a coincidence. Two days ago when asked she added a letter to the word and said "ung-y". Again I was dismissive, I mean I know this child is exceptional, but a word at two-months old?!?!

Last night she said it three times, each time more fully developing the word. The first time was in the early evening. She got fussy and Karna asked her, "Are you hungry?” She replied with ung-y and then proceeded to fuss until she got fed. I was again dismissive. Later in the evening while Karna was changing her, Lucanne spontaneously added the "h" and said "hug-y". I didn't hear that one and was equally dismissive. Finally it was late evening and Karna had just handed me Lucanne after a fresh diaper and a change into her night gown and she got really agitated and fussy. I was trying to hold her on my lap so she could do her leg pushing and she started to get really agitated, so I asked her, "Lucanne! What is going on with you?!?" and she replied "Hung-y!" clear as day. I couldn't be dismissive, but I was skeptical, she had just fed 30 minutes prior. So I handed her to Karna, she SMILED, and latched on for a long feeding.

So there you have it, not only did our daughter say her first word, but she knows what it means and uses it correctly. I am astounded and will be telling anyone who will listen this story for days at least!!

When I put it all in perspective the reality of this little girl’s ability just floors me. Today she is 8-weeks-old and we already are going to have to watch what we say, watch what have on the TV, and figure out what we need to be doing to stimulate her well. I have a feeling that by the time she's two-years-old, Lucanne will be asking questions Karna and I won't have answers to...we are in deep s#!t...and I love it!! And I love our family!!

With much love to all,
Ty